Mary A. Buxton

Mary A. Buxton of Hingham, a former nurse at South Shore Hospital, died at home on December 6, 2011, after a courageous battle with adult onset chronic lymphocytic leukemia. She was 75. Born in Corsica, Pa., Ms. Buxton received her nursing degree from Bradford Hospital School of Nursing, Bradford, Pa., in 1956. “Mary loved school,” said Janet Anderson, a nursing school classmate and lifelong friend. “She was always reading to learn more. She wanted to know everything there was to know about nursing and being a nurse.” While working tirelessly at her profession and caring for her five children, she pursued education throughout her life, earning a bachelor of science degree in psychology from Emmanuel College in 1983 and a master of science degree in nursing from Northeastern University in 2004, when she was 68. Ms. Buxton joined the staff at South Shore Hospital in 1968 and worked in all phases of nursing care, including the operating and recovery rooms. “Mary was the ultimate in kindness,” said Dr. Richard Mirabile, who worked with her for many years at South Shore. “She had the softest voice and never had a bad word to say about anybody.” In the 1990s, she studied patient stress reduction techniques at the Mind-Body Institute at Deaconess Hospital and at the UMass Medical Center Stress Reduction Clinic. In 1995, she founded South Shore Hospital’s Stress Reduction Clinic, which used yoga, meditation, and behavior modification techniques to help patients and hospital staff in high-stress situations. In addition to teaching classes for hospital staff, she gave stress-reduction lectures and workshops to businesses and organizations. At first, the program was not universally welcomed. “There were people who felt that this wasn’t needed,” said Dr. James Wechsler, a retired anesthesiologist and founder of the Pain Clinic at South Shore. “The standard model for people with chronic pain prior to her approach was to give them medicine and the psychological aspects of pain were ignored. But if patients can learn to cope with stress and decrease the amount of medicine they need, it can give them a more positive outlook and a sense of empowerment over their condition. It was a wonderful thing that she created and serves as a model for other programs.” Dr. Wechsler added that Ms. Buxton’s way with patients, which he had first observed years earlier in the recovery room, made her especially effective. “She was an extremely compassionate person and approached patients with human kindness,” he said, “which too often is absent, especially in a world where medicine has become highly technical and people start to replace the humanitarian aspect with tests and data. She knew about those things, too, but she gave so much more.” Ms. Buxton’s warmth, good humor, and kindness were legendary. “She was always smoothing the way for her children, her friends and her co-workers, advising, comforting, helping people navigate the often scary medical world.” said a longtime Hingham friend. Another friend, who had suffered the death of a child, said that Ms. Buxton would always ask about the family. “Sometimes these tragedies are very isolating,” the friend said. “At a time when most people would avoid talking to me, Mary was the one to say, ‘How are you?’ That was huge for us. She really wanted to know. That was a quality you can’t buy.” Ms. Buxton was a longtime member of the Hingham Congregational Church, and had been active in Bible study groups as well as in youth programs and the choir. She was intensely involved in her children’s lives, and then in her grandchildren’s lives. She faced serious health crises in her family with practical optimism. With her own illness, she kept a positive and grateful attitude, determined to get the last bit of good out of life. She was still enjoying a laugh with friends in her last days, and even got her Christmas cards in the mail. She leaves two daughters: Diane of Watertown and Sallie Story of Hopkinton, N.H.; three sons: Michael and wife Susan of Webster, N.H., Robert of New Brighton, Pa., and David and wife Jennifer of Waltham; three sisters: Ruby Crawford of Mercer, Pa., Sue Mars and husband Bill of Castro Valley, Calif., and Millie Himes and husband John of Brookville, Pa.; four grandchildren, Madelyn, Robert, and Kelly Buxton and Matthew Story; her former husband, Edward Buxton, of Contoocook, N.H. Also several nieces and nephews. Visiting hours Friday, December 9, from 4 to 8 p.m., at Pyne Keohane Funeral Home, 21 Emerald St., Hingham (www.keohane.com). A funeral will be held Saturday, December 10, at 10 a.m., at Hingham Congregational Church, and burial will be alongside her parents in Center Hill Cemetery, Brookville, Pa. In lieu of flowers, donations in memory of Mary Buxton may be sent to Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center, 330 Brookline Avenue, Boston, MA 02215 ATTN: Grateful Nation (www.gratefulnation.org), or to Omega Institute for Holistic Studies, 150 Lake Drive, Rhinebeck, New York 12572 ATTN: Brett Cobb (www.eomega.org/omega/donate).